"DROWNER"

by Brian Andrew Marek

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about

I'M A DOWN
I'M A DOWNER
I'M A DROWNER

credits

released March 15, 2016

KATE MAREK - HARMONY VOCALS
ON "HEY MR. SANDMAN"
MICHAEL THOMPSON - SOME ENGINEERING
ALL OTHER HATS WORN BY BaM

BASIC TRACKS FOR "CAPTAIN CAPTAIN"
RECORDED AT STATELY SKJLE MANOR
EVERYTHING ELSE RECORDED
IN THE BARGAIN BASEMENT

THANK YOU
KATE
MYK
KJLE
ROBERT HEDGES
TIM MCAVIN
JIM MCKINNEY
ROCKET PARK

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license

all rights reserved

about

Brian Andrew Marek St Louis, Missouri

Brian Andrew Marek has been playing and singing his way in and out of a variety of bands (including Angus Tweed, Not Actual Size, Lemonade, Popcorn, Rocket Park, Bargain Basement and The Vertigo Swirl) for over 25 years and has, in recent years, carved out a low-key, low-fidelity niche with his Bargain Basement recording studio and Rubberstamp Records label. ... more

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Track Name: Captain Captain
Captain captain, thanks for stopping
thanks for taking me aboard
I was sinking, I was drowning
I was pleading with my Lord
Lost at sea and half insane
I wrestled with a hurricane
captain captain, thank you once again

Captain captain, name my duties
tell me how to earn my keep
and if I should ever fail you
cast me in the briny deep

Please excuse my vacant stare
the fear behind my eyes
coming up to gasp for air
beneath the stormy skies

Captain captain, I’m no martyr
I’m the one who made this bed
but while riding in this vessel
I’ll respect the figurehead
Track Name: Burning to the Ground
she has a dangerous addiction
to a dangerous man
who's been flying off the handle
since the whole thing began
and lately she's been losing sleep
and wondering why she can't compete
when all his drinking buddies come around
home sweet home is burning to the ground

she has a dangerous addiction
to a dangerous man
who's adept at burning bridges
when the shit hits the fan
and lately she's been looking for
that germ of kindness at his core
which long ago he lost and never found
home sweet home is burning to the ground
Track Name: For the Smile
you can take a swing
you can take a shot
I won't raise a hand
give me all you've got
it'll take a while
for the smile to come back

make me see the stars
make me see the light
I won't clench my fist
I don't have the fight
it'll take a while
for the smile to come back

and if I seem to invite it
just a little bit too much
I'm so alone I'm excited
for even that kind of touch

I won't turn away
I don't have the pride
I may walk and talk
but I'm dead inside
it'll take a while
for the smile to come back
Track Name: Repeating the Mantra
you hallelujah holocaust
I knew your price but not your cost
and I only trusted you ‘cos you had trusted me
seems so unimportant now, so hard to clearly see
why you had to repeat the mantra

it figures I’d back the wrong horse
a well-taught child of divorce
go on, tell me that is has no bearing on our plight
seems so unimportant ever since that autumn night
when you had to defeat the mantra

where’d you get this notion that I held you in a cage
why’d you cast me in your life, then kick me from the stage

three months have passed and it appears
I’ve stopped believing in your tears
they are just red herrings without reason, without rhyme
seems so unimportant knowing I can’t turn back time
back to when you’d repeat the mantra
Track Name: Suspended in Amber
there’s nothing to say, there’s nothing to do
you're turning your back, you're turning the screw
I’m spending my nights just counting the days
since your waning moon put me out of phase

why must you always leave me this way
suspended in amber again

you’re screwing me up, you’re screwing me down
I feel like a fool, I feel like a clown
how dare you, pray tell, what gives you the right
to plug up my ears and rob me of sight

looking for secrets in reference books
and long conversations with friends
looking for hope on a face in the crowd
the hope this eventually ends
Track Name: Nothing at All
often I'm scared that I'm just not prepared
for what's lurking outside my front door
so I decide that I'll just stay inside
for an hour or day or week more
give me my crutch and a meaningful touch
to remind me that I'm not alone
but I implore you to lock every door
disconnect every last telephone

sometimes I feel very small
sometimes I feel nothing at all

I'd give the name of somebody to blame
if I thought it would help me move on
but copping out is what that's all about
and you can't punish someone who's gone
what do you do when the problem is you
'cos the problem is how you were made
too full of self to be somebody else
or ride on a float in their parade

and sometimes I feel like I'm fading away
Track Name: Aberdeen
bah boppa boppa bom bow
bah boppa boppa bom bow

all that can be said you say
return to dust and blow away
all that you can say's been said
and winning means you lose your head
don't go our tonight or you'll be seen
as you count the miles to here from Aberdeen

all that was presumed was true
but somewhat short of true to you
all that's true had been presumed
you fanned the flames and were consumed
true believers don't care what you mean
as you count the miles to here from Aberdeen

all in all is all we are
and some give their all in a jar
all we are is all in all
so high we rise, so far we fall
make the scene your life, your life a scene
as you count the miles to here from Aberdeen
Track Name: Reality Came Knocking
I was drunk on love and it tasted like sangria
when reality came knocking at my door
I was high on life or that general idea
when reality came knocking at my door

I tried to ignore it, pretend that I was gone
I had no need for it to linger on and on and on

posed as an adult during mid-life adolescence
when reality came knocking at my door
acted like a child in a real child's presence
when reality came knocking at my door

I had to lie low, had to lie down in my bed
I dimmed the lights and pulled the sheets over my head

I was so naive, thought I had my shit together
when reality came knocking at my door
thought I had a roof in my time of stormy weather
when reality came knocking at my door
Track Name: A Song to Make You Stay
I know I could never write a
song to make you stay when you're set on leaving
I'll just walk away and go on believing
that you're gonna hug me, touch me, love me
one fine day

I know I could never undo
all the things I did, all the ways I hurt you
all the times I hid, seeming to desert you
times I could've hugged you, touched you, loved you
but instead

I always took you for granted
in the cruelest ways
I'd give a million dollars
to relive those days

I know I could never write a
song to make you stay, you're already long gone
tired of the way I gave you the long con
tired of the lying, prying, crying
every day
Track Name: Surrender
So this is how it ends
Well, at least I’ve had my fun
Just for the record, please
Who has lost and who has won?

I know it’s unimportant trivia to you
I know I must surrender
But who must I surrender to?

So this is where we stand
Well, my stomach’s tied in knots
Because I’ve got to know
Who is going to call the shots

I swear I didn’t know it was a crime
I speak no language and
I have no sense of time

So this is why we live
Well, I want my money back
Who paints in shades of blue
While I fall into the black?
Track Name: Hey Mr. Sandman
Hey Mister Sandman, lend me a hand, man
Send a dream right over, you could be my four leaf clover
Hey Mister Sandman, where do I stand, man
In your world of slumber I know I’m not just a number

When times start getting tough
Too much is not enough
So won’t you strut your stuff today
When I can’t stand my head
I place it in a bed
And let myself be led astray

Hey Mister Sandman, things aren’t as planned, man
I’ve been getting thinner, skipping lunch and skipping dinner
Hey Mister Sandman, no cash in hand, man
I could pay you Monday for a pleasant dream on Sunday

Hey Mister Sandman, life is just grand, man
I just stare in wonder ever since you put me under
Hey Mister Sandman, please understand, man
Long as I need sleeping, you’re the company I’m keeping
Track Name: Lovers in a Leaking Boat
lovers in a leaking boat on a stormy sea
you can cling to me while we're sinking fast
pounded by the tidal waves, pitching fore & aft
seems our little craft wasn't meant to last

we've got no way of turning back
we're taking on the inky black
we've gone off course, we've lost our grip
abandon hope, abandon ship

lovers in a leaking boat drifting far from shore
once our lives were war, now we'll rest in peace

we've got no way of turning back
we're taking on the inky black
we've gone off course, we've lost our grip
abandon hope, abandon ship

lovers in a leaking boat vanishing from view
I can cling to you while we're sinking fast
mother nature rushes in, we can only yield
for our fate was sealed somewhere in the past