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Utopian Flying Machines

by Brian Andrew Marek

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1.
why am I hearing music why am I hearing conversations why am I hearing music in my hundred year old house have I begun to lose it have I had a hallucination have I begun to lose it in my hundred year old house are we host to a ghost sending us a message from the great beyond poltergeists? Jesus Christ! someone left the TV on why am I hearing music why am I hearing conversations why am I hearing music in my hundred year old house
2.
Believe Me 02:51
I'm not the new messiah, I'm not the chosen one this ain't a holy man you're seeing I'm awkward and self-conscious when showing anyone the circumstances of my being, believe me I mask the tears with laughter, the fact with fantasy and add a chapter to your story I wish that I could tell you things aren't how they seem but this is me in all my glory, believe me I'll lay it all on the line for you, friend there are characters in every scene winners and losers and wise men and fools but I'm always somewhere in between I'm not a football hero, I'm not a movie star I've seen no profit from my dreaming I'm equally unable to be as others are to be a normal human being, believe me
3.
I was twenty-odd years old, feelin lonely’, feelin’ bored And the drizzly afternoons just mocked my tears But my head was turned around by a special kind of sound That had found its way into my happy ears Now I find my shoulders are a bit less tense And assembly instructions make a bit more sense And I ain’t gonna worry ‘bout the debts and rents and bills ‘cos I’m doin’ tha Winston, doin’ tha Winston It’ll cure whatever makes you ill Doin’ tha Winston, doin’ tha Winston Do tha Winston ‘til you’ve had your fill So I told my friend the news and he said he’d heard it too Long ago but it was just like yesterday For despite ensuing times he could still recall the rhymes And the melodies that never die away Now he finds his shoulders are a bit less tense And assembly instructions make a bit more sense And he ain’t gonna worry ‘bout the debts and rents and bills ‘cos he’s doin’ tha Winston, doin’ tha Winston It’ll cure whatever makes you ill Doin’ tha Winston, doin’ tha Winston Do tha Winston ‘til you’ve had your fill Now we find our shoulders are a bit less tense And assembly instructions make a bit more sense And we ain’t gonna worry ‘bout the debts and rents and bills ‘cos we’re doin’ tha Winston, doin’ tha Winston It’ll cure whatever makes you ill Doin’ tha Winston, doin’ tha Winston Do tha Winston ‘til you’ve had your fill Do tha Winston ‘til you’ve had your fill Spread the word and soon the whole world will
4.
Syd Barrett's on cassette auto-reverse so he's forever helping me to forget all about ties and how they sever us when the hope is gone there is just a song to pull me through this shirt is getting rank as are my Peter Pan green longjohns rather be high than tanked but Captain Morgan's like a long gone friend when the hope is gone there is just a song to pull me through I tried my hand at mending fences with such disastrous consequences as soon as I came to my senses I wanted things back how they were how could I raise a hand overwhelmed by frustrated anger how could I understand I'm always last to know I'm dangerous when the hope is gone there is just a song to pull me through
5.
saw a film 'bout a world of wealth and the coolest, latest stuff where a man died of failing health 'cos he didn't earn enough - ENOUGH! stop the show, I gotta go the whole thing makes me sick stop the show, I gotta go it's cut me to the quick saw a film 'bout a wicked king who they said had stole the crown spent eight years doing wicked things and it brought his kingdom down, down, down still I hear the soundtrack everywhere see the actors' faces that just stare feel the apprehension in the air smell the stink of people who don't care
6.
I don’t wanna go to work today I just wanna stay at home and play I just wanna sit and pet my dog Write another dozen goofy songs I wish that I could call in sick But they would fire me p.d. quick I don’t wanna go to work today I just wanna live in disarray Act according to a whim or hunch Eat whatever I would like for lunch I’d like to call in a bomb threat But Gitmo’s what I’d probably get I don’t wanna go to work today If I thought that it would help, I’d pray For a blizzard on the first of June But I don’t think it’ll happen soon I’d like to say my truck just died But they’d just tell me, “get a ride”
7.
Dark Things 06:02
I can't stop, can't stop messing around with dark things, dark things under the ground the dark things that I wish I'd never found, yeah I can't stop, can't stop seeking the facts of dark things, dark things, secrets and pacts the dark things and the men who do dark acts, yeah but you, you're the calming breeze putting me at ease when the dark things get me down you're the guiding light shining through the night when the dark things get me... I can't stop, can't stop thinking about the dark things, dark things I wanna shout the dark things to which I've become devout, yeah I can't stop, can't stop hoping for hope when dark things, dark things tighten the rope the dark things and the things I do to cope, yeah dark things are wrestling in my soul dark things are wrestling for control
8.
Well, Winona 03:43
Winona says she's true to me, but how can I be sure you couldn't call her simple and you couldn't call her pure she's got a checkered history, she's got two roving eyes she's got the brains and beauty and she's got a way with guys well Winona, goes to show ya I think I know ya well enough by now, Winona well Winona, goes to show ya I think I know ya well enough by now, Winona Winona says she's true to me, but I've heard that before from every nymphomaniac and every girl next door so when she starts accusing me of sleeping 'round and such I'm thinking that the lady maybe doth protest too much well Winona, goes to show ya I think I know ya well enough by now, Winona well Winona, goes to show ya I think I know ya well enough by now, Winona Winona says she's true to me, so cancel all I've said I haven't got a solitary worry in my head I only told you 'cos it seemed a good way to begin I only told you so you'd know how strong my faith has been
9.
ain't many gonna see that scar you left upon me not metaphorically - I mean it literally a surgical incision that left me living with your decision ain't many gonna see that scar you left upon me ain't many gonna see that scar you left upon me for all eternity but not for posterity you robbed me of creation and put me back into circulation ain't many gonna see that scar you left upon me ain't many gonna see that scar you left upon me one more indignity, stamping me indelibly a show of faith, forever only for the ties that bind to sever ain't many gonna see that scar you left upon me
10.
there's an angry man on the TV set screamin' lawdy, lawdy, lawdy, better not forget that this world is hard and this world is cruel screamin' lawdy, lawdy, lawdy, don'tcha play the fool when the white hats come, knockin' at your door screamin' lawdy, lawdy, lawdy, it's a time of war well ya can't go north and ya can't go south screamin' lawdy, lawdy, lawdy, better shut your mouth there's an angry man on the TV screen screamin' lawdy, lawdy, lawdy, lookin' tough and mean he might be a priest or the President screamin' lawdy, lawdy, lawdy, he can just get bent
11.
We were headed back from Abalam Singin’ that Black Betty, bam-a-lam Thought a rest stop might just be the digs For gentlemen to tighten up their wigs So the driver, little Zeke, picked us out a park bench seat But he stayed off the grass, son Suddenly, Zeke started freaking out Thought he was the one who’d gone without Seems some guy was standing over there, a janitor who didn’t seem to care Someone said, man, what’s the gripe He really doesn’t look the type To stay off the grass, son We just went about our thing and then We prepared to hit the road again Here’s the punchline you’ve been waiting for While walking out the rest stop restroom door Same old janitor walked past, he said his first and said his last He said, stay off the grass, son
12.
show up on my doorstep tell me that you faked your death I would keep your secret to my own last dying breath I just want you here so I don’t have to know you’re really gone show up on my doorstep tell me that it’s all a joke idle speculation by somebody who misspoke I just want you here so I don’t have to know you’re really gone I want to deny but then again maybe it’s true I don’t want to cry but then again maybe I do show up on my doorstep tell me you’re alive and well say you’re not the reason for the tolling of the bell I just want you here so I don’t have to know you’re really gone
13.
peanut butter toast and tea darling, won't you dine with me oh, the visions we will see eating peanut butter toast and tea eating peanut butter toast and tea peanut butter toast and tea hide and seek means follow me to a cabin by the sea for some peanut butter toast and tea for some peanut butter toast and tea see what you've done you've got me on the run when we had just begun to begin peanut butter toast and tea I'll be you and you'll be me feeling happy, feeling free eating peanut butter toast and tea eating peanut butter toast and tea
14.
when you're at war with a woman none of your strategies make any sense when you're at war with a woman you can't attack and you've got no defense and nothing you say or you do's gonna save you this time and you stand accused in the Hague of a thousand war crimes when you're at war with a woman every foot gained means a mile of retreat when you're at war with a woman lay down your arms and admit your defeat but there'll be no break in the battle beneath your white flag and you start to wonder if you're going home in a bag
15.
everywhere it's horses for courses everywhere it's do just what you do I've been waiting for a new messiah with more to offer than just being new and baby it's you I'll give you an ear and a shoulder I'll give you a life that can't be bought I'll keep putting meat upon your table and all my honey in your honeypot it's all that I've got everywhere it's horses for courses everywhere it's do just what you do I've been waiting for a new messiah with more to offer than just being new and baby it's you
16.
my kitty cat is black and white she might have teeth but she won’t bite she might have claws but she won’t fight my kitty cat is black and white my kitty cat has pretty fur and she makes such a happy purr every time I’m petting her my kitty cat has pretty fur and her name is Domino, Dominominomino Dominominominominominomino my kitty cat sleeps in my bed curled up content beside my head sometimes she’s by my feet instead my kitty cat sleeps in my bed and her name is Domino, Dominominomino Dominominominominominomino my kitty cat is black and white she might have teeth but she won’t bite she might have claws but she won’t fight my kitty cat is black and white
17.
I don't care if you understand me I've got one that does back at home you haven't the right to demand me and I've got no reason to roam I don't have the time in my schedule I don't have the room in my world 'cos I am in love with a woman and you're little more than a girl I'm flattered by all the attention but find that you're standing too near and hey, did I happen to mention that I'm getting married next year I don't want to star in your breakdowns or make cameos in your bed I ain't gonna fall for your shakedowns or let you get into my head
18.
nobody calls 'cos nobody cares nobody does 'cos nobody dares no one awakes to be caught unawares is there anyone living out there? nobody feels 'cos nobody fakes nobody talks 'cos none of it takes nobody mentions each other's mistakes is there anyone living out there? too hot to trot, too cool to fool and too clued-in to have a clue one day we'll all look back and laugh at you nobody's weird 'cos nobody's wise nobody falls 'cos nobody flies nobody triumphs 'cos nobody tries is there anyone living out there?
19.
I'm a No One 02:37
I've got no time to tarry I own more than I can carry I'm a no one, no one, no one nobody ever told me how the circumstance would mold me I'm a no one, no one, no one I'm a no one, no one, no one I take the dog for walkies or sit home and watch the talkies I'm a no one, no one, no one then later I go shopping for ice cream and chocolate topping I'm a no one, no one, no one I'm a no one, no one, no one I used to think I had to live for the scene dress like a model from GQ Magazine you ask me now, I say I'd rather be dead than have that burden on my head I do the things I do because I can't not this peace of mind I've come to know can't be bought you seem to think that it's all pussy and bread baby, put that out of your head it's nothing I can't handle just a funny kind of scandal I'm a no one, no one, no one I'd rather have my sofa than a box seat at the copa I'm a no one, no one, no one I'm a no one, no one, no one
20.
Turn to Dust 03:01
I've got the feeling something's wrong there's something here that don't belong I've gotta know what's going on I'm gonna drag my burden down to New Orleans and put some mileage on my old blue jeans I'm gonna head on down that road 'til it turns to dust when you don't never jump the track the scenery begins to crack that's why I've filled my traveling sack I'm gonna drag my burden down to Arkansas and put some mileage on my old guitar I'm gonna head on down that road 'til it turns to dust I've got the feeling something's wrong there's something here that don't belong I've gotta know what's going on I'm gonna drag my burden down to New Orleans and put some mileage on my old blue jeans I'm gonna head on down that road 'til it turns to dust
21.
Coming Home 02:12
well, it's been a month or two 'cos I've had this job to do but I'll soon be seeing you I'm coming home engine, engine, number nine take me down that iron line gotta see my girl on time I'm coming home strike up the band in every land no more to roam this world alone I'm coming home there's temptations at each turn fiery passions that still burn but it's to you I'll return I'm coming home
22.
I'm in another basement in another part of town with a download comin' down the features are familiar but so much has changed inside that you may as well have died but ten seventeen oh seven's gonna be alright ten seventeen oh seven's gonna be alright ten seventeen oh seven's gonna be like seventh heaven after spending seven years in your hell I trusted without question let you underneath my skin and it nearly did me in a million happy endings couldn't justify the means living through those ugly scenes but ten seventeen oh seven's gonna be alright you've not earned my forgiveness with the passing of the years and the drying of my tears I hate you like a cancer and I hate you like a curse every day I hate you worse but ten seventeen oh seven's gonna be alright
23.
You Don't 04:27
I guess I messed up again I let her down as a friend and a partner it all depends on the date I could be sinner or saint to her martyr investigations open, but her cover's far too deep extrapolating failure from the company I keep and this is what she tells me just before she goes to sleep you don't understand the way I'm feeling I should stand beside you but I'm kneeling lately I've suspected dirty dealings 'cos you don't really care about my feelings I guess I said the wrong words or spoke when she'd have preferred I be silent she gave my phrases a frisk full knowing there was no risk I'd turn violent just give her inspiration and some time and lots of space and handwriting analysis will help her crack the case I'll sing while holding proof I'm innocent right in her face you don't understand the way I'm feeling I should stand beside you but I'm kneeling lately I've suspected dirty dealings 'cos you don't really care about my feelings

about

Disconcertingly shaky, held together by duct tape and dreams but somehow managing to occasionally achieve flight, these are my "utopian flying machines" - 14 diverse tracks banged out in my basement over the last seven months at no small expense to my brain cells (not that I'm complaining). Recorded on the same old school Tascam reel-to-reel four track that produced "The Vertigo Swirl", this lastest batch of songs and sounds finds me yet again looting and pillaging all my favorite genres for an eclectic pop/rock blend lyrically covering such topics as love, death, work, politics, ghosts, Walt Winston, conspiracy theories and, of course, peanut butter toast and tea. As is often the case, my ambitions outstripped the facilities at my disposal, resulting in a murky, low fidelity echo of the classic rock productions I love - hopefully these sonic imperfections are more interesting than offensive to the listener. So here it is, a distorted aural snapshot of myself in 2009, unwashed and naked (but making funny faces here and there), setting off in my psychedelic airship. Enjoy the flight.

credits

released August 17, 2009

Kate Marek played bass guitar on "Show Up on My Doorstep" and sang on "Believe Me", "Doin' tha Winston", "Dark Things", "Screamin' Lawdy" and "Peanut Butter Toast and Tea"
Shane Bert played tambourine and sang on "Screamin' Lawdy"
all other vocal and instrumental performances by Brian Andrew Marek

all compositions by Brian Andrew Marek except "Peanut Butter Toast and Tea" (Marek/Bert)

engineered and produced by Brian Andrew Marek in The Bargain Basement, January-July 2009

photography by Kate Marek in The Affordable Attic
cover art and title from a 19th century French chromolithograph "Les Utopies de la Navigation Aerienne au Siecle Dernier"

BONUS: The Lair (EP)
tracks 15-23 recorded 2007-2008
all songs written by Brian Andrew Marek
all instruments and vocals performed by Brian Andrew Marek

Rubberstamp Records RSR-016

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Rubberstamp Records St Louis, Missouri

Rubberstamp Records is a DIY indie record label based in the Saint Louis, MO area and helmed by local music scene veteran Brian Andrew Marek.

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